I'm Shelby and I am 17 years old.
I like: Harry Potter, Starkid, Degrassi, How I Met Your Mother, Diet Coke, Glee, Darren Criss, Pizza, Men, Bert's Bees, Smiling, Cuteness, Show Choir, Musicals, Food.
I dislike: Math, Jerks, Justin Bieber, Chapped Lips, stubbing my toe, bare walls, lettuce.
Catching Elephant is a theme by Andy Taylor
Because instantly alienating a huge chunk of your demographic through offensive humour is the best way to sell soda pop. (x)
Hazel: Touch the cave wall
Computer: You touch the wall. It is moist
Isaac: Lick the cave wall
Computer: I do not understand. Repeat?
Hazel: Hump the moist cave wall
Computer: You attempt to jump. You hit your head.
Isaac: Not jump, HUMP.
Computer: I don't understand
Isaac: Dude, I've been alone in the dark in this cave for weeks and I need some relief. HUMP THE CAVE WALL
Computer: You attempt to ju-
Hazel: Thrust pelvis against the cave wall
Computer: I do not-
Isaac: Make sweet love to the cave
(Source: anchorsandmoons)
(Source: i-am-the-oracular-spectacular)
(Source: smilezexpress)
the mediocre gatsby
the decent wall of china
the ok depression
Reblog if you’re old enough to get this
Laughter. Horrified laughter.
You know what’s kind of beautiful?
In French, you don’t really say “I miss you.” You say “tu me manques,” which is closer to “you are missing from me.”
I love that. “You are missing from me.” You are a part of me, you are essential to my being. You are like a limb, or an organ, or blood. I cannot function without you.
(Source: timorleste)
Henry: I heard a garbage truck.
John: You heard a garbage truck?
Hank: I didn’t.
Girl, you should haunt them.
Oh, damn, this is pretty smart on so many levels, hahahaha.
(Source: courtneyhatesjane)
(Source: getsleazyasf)
(Source: tiffhouck)
